The Wildly Confident Podcast

We’re back – Welcome to Season 2 of the Wildly Confident Podcast!!

On episode 26, I am going to share with you how to stop procrastinating. 

Ready to be complete your New Year’s Resolutions in FULL this year? 

Or meet any other BIG goal you have in your life? 

Feel like you get off to a great start and are inspired…and then you end up slowly quitting over the next month? 

Then take a listen- it’s actually “easy” to follow through IF you know the tips & tricks I am going to share with you in this episode!

On this episode you will learn: 

  • Why you Procrastinate
  • How Procrastination operates in your brain
  • Tools to help you not Procrastinate so you can meet your goals this year!!

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Welcome Home Goddess

Hi, I'm Kathrine. I'm a certified Life Coach, Creatrix of my own Multi Million $ Biz, Intersectional Feminist, & Mama to 3 little people. I'm like a combo of a top business strategist, manifesting maven and a No-BS best friend who will call you out and get you back on track to your ideal life.

I've had wild success in all areas of my life and I can't wait to share with your my mindset & manifesting secrets.

We will also make strategic, actionable plans with accountability to help you get what you want...and....we move all those crappy emotions, traumas & limiting patterns out of your body & psyche so you can get the confidence & results that are waiting for you!

Want to read the episode instead?

Speaker 1: (00:00)
Hey, I’m so excited. You’re here for season two of the wildly confident podcast, and I’m excited. You’re here to spend 10 or 15 minutes to up level your life today. And today we’re talking about procrastination. Procrastination is something that everyone does from time to time. So it’s a completely normal behavior. And it’s actually done out of loving kindness from part of our brain. It’s just often in conflict with the goals that we make and our executive functioning brain to move our lives ahead with our future vision. Okay, so I’m doing this because it’s new year’s resolution time. It’s also the time of the year where we sit in winter and we reflect on the past and we think, what have we gotten done? What do we still wanna get done? And then what do we wanna do in the future? This is just a beautiful time for, for new beginnings.

Speaker 1: (00:59)
And it’s a time where we’re gonna be, be working on planting the seeds for what we wanna grow. But so often the seeds of new year’s resolutions never make it to the light of day because people stop watering them. They stop giving them the sunlight, right? They stop giving them the energy they need in the winter time to sprout up in the spring because they’re procrastinating on them, right? We have to give energy to things for order in order for them to grow. We can’t just plant them in the ground and walk away. Okay. So as we’re preparing our new year’s resolutions right now, and you’re thinking through what you desire in your life for 2022, and we start gathering those seeds, those ideas, and we, we decide to plant them, right? I wanna walk you through some processes to help you stay on track with giving them the energy.

Speaker 1: (01:55)
They need to grow into something fruitful in your life. So knowing that we all procrastinate, I’m gonna talk to you a little bit about why, cuz I actually think it’s really helpful to know the why. So the word procrastination actually comes from a ancient Greek word, um, Acia, which means doing something against our better judgment. And this goes back to what I was just talking about in the beginning of a podcast, but our better judgment. I refer to that as the executive functioning part of our brain, not to say that the rest of our brain doesn’t have great judgment, cuz it does in a, in absolutely in so many different ways, but it really isn’t good with future thinking. It’s not good with thinking about like meeting goals in the future. It’s very much focused on the here and now and how to keep you safe right here.

Speaker 1: (02:42)
And safety is a huge, huge, huge thing that your brain, the part, the subconscious part of your brain really focuses on. And what happens with procrastination is there’s a number of things. But the main thing that happens is that there’s a negative emotion that comes up when you’re going to do your, your resolution, your new year’s resolution. A few examples might be, um, showing up more consist consistently on your Instagram account. Okay. Another one might be losing 15 pounds. Okay. I’m gonna use those two. Cause I they’re really common things I hear from people. And, and when you think about doing those things, there’s a negative feeling in your body, a negative emotion that comes up and you don’t want to do them. right. You, you might, you just, it just feels dis discomfort, right? And, and so the body, the body takes discomfort is kind of like a threat and it seeks to make you feel better.

Speaker 1: (03:41)
And that’s why you procrastinate. Okay? So you don’t procrastinate because you’re lazy. You don’t procrastinate cuz you didn’t make a list or you didn’t get the special new year’s resolution app. That’s gonna help you stay on track. Okay? You didn’t procrastinate cuz you’re out of control. Really. You know, you don’t need to have more control life. You don’t need to beat yourself up every single day in order to follow through. The reason you’re procrastinating is because your emotions, your desire to have a positive emotion is taking over your vision for the, your future self. So the key, the secret to not procrastinating or the secret to getting the results you, you want from your new year’s resolution, to seeing that seed grow up from the ground and turn into a beautiful whatever you’re looking to grow, you know, a beautiful business, a beautiful body, whatever beautiful result you’re looking to grow in your life right now is emotional literacy, understanding and love loving on your emotions.

Speaker 1: (04:44)
It’s all about emotional regulation. That is why you procrastinate. And that’s why probably for many years in a row you have failed at your new year’s resolutions or you’ve only partially succeeded is because you are not managing your emotions and you are letting them in this present moment, hijack your resolution. And I love the present moment. You’ve heard me do a lot of podcasts on it, but in this episode, I’m actually gonna be also talking to you about why future thinking is so important. One of the reasons also that procr, why we procrastinate and why we fail at our resolutions is because our brain is more wired for short term rewards over long term. So if our goal is to lose 15 pounds, which I’m not saying is like a worthy goal to have one way or the other, right? Like, you know, I’m not buying into the patriarchal idea of us having to look a certain way, but I it’s also, I’m not gonna discount someone’s goal for wanting to, to lose 15 pounds.

Speaker 1: (05:45)
So I’m not gonna get into the specifics on whether or not that’s a good goal to have. It’s all personal and up to you. And as long as it resonates with you, then it’s a good goal for you. But someone has a goal to lose this 15 pounds, let’s say by their beach vacation in June, that’s six months. That’s pretty, that’s, that’s a quite a bit of time to do that and seems pretty reasonable. Um, but yet June comes around and they don’t do it yet. And the reason why, or they haven’t done it yet. And the reason why this shows up and why people procrastinate, why they end up eating the cookie every day or doing the things that they’re trying not to do is because they are more attached. And in this present moment, in that short term reward system than in the long term reward, they’re actually not very attached to their future self.

Speaker 1: (06:36)
And so I’ll give you the first tip right now on how to work on procrastination is to get more attached to your future self. This is why vision boards are really powerful because they actually show pictures of your future self and people leave them, sitting out to remind their brain. That’s what they desire. It helps people overcome their short term rewards when they can visually I think the visual part’s really important. And I that’s one of the reasons when I do my Fortuna work with people and helping people with reverse engineering, their goals for the year and how to stay on track to meet those goals. I E now not procrastinate, um, not get distracted by shiny pretty things or other things that come up for people. Um, it’s visual. They can hang up, it just taps into a part of the brain. That’s like, oh, that is me too, this future thing.

Speaker 1: (07:33)
But I think sometimes we just write it down in a piece of paper. We’re like, this is my goal. Cuz I want this in my life. You, the brain has a really hard time identifying with that future self more. It’s harder for your brain to identify with that than it is to identify with this very moment and the short term reward of procrastination, which is just getting out of a place of discomfort into a place that feels better. Okay. And the thing about procrastination is it’s like a self-fulfilling prophecy. Unfortunately the more you do it with something, the harder it gets to dig yourself out, it becomes the vicious or chronic pattern because you’re being rewarded by procrastinating with relief. So your brain’s like, it’s like a little bit of a drug, right? It’s like, well I want that relief again. I want that relief again.

Speaker 1: (08:21)
But we also know that the more that you procrastinate, the more stressed out you are are, and the lower self-compassion you have because you start to feel like you’re never gonna be able to lose that 15 pounds, or you’re never gonna be able to create that Instagram account. You want to, to build your business. Like you start to doubt yourself. And this is important because one of the other tools that I use with clients to help when they’re procrastinating a lot is self-compassion and forgiveness. If you’re stopped judging yourself, you will move into freeze mode. You will not make any progress forward and means you’re gonna be stuck. Then procrast, then you’re gonna be stuck, um, buffering or procrastinating, distracting yourself on even forgiving yourself. And then you still have to deal with the thing you’re trying to get done. That seed you planted. Right?

Speaker 1: (09:14)
so I, you just gotta forgive yourself for all the procrastination you’ve done up to today. Just have compassion and just know that you’re gonna procrastinate in the future. It’s just part of the human brain, right? Procrastination is there because your body wants you to feel good. So we can say like, Hey, thank you procrastination. I see, see you’re showing up. Cuz my body’s in some discomfort, I’m judging myself. I’m feeling like, I don’t know if I can do this. I don’t know if I’ve got it in me. Doesn’t feel very good in my body. And I see you’re showing up to make me feel better. Thank you. But I can see over here on my Fortuna or my vision board or whatever you, you might wanna have to kind of create that future self image that you could have it in front of you, that I can already see my future self having this thing.

Speaker 1: (10:05)
And so I’m gonna keep doing this, even though I’m in discomfort, I’m gonna let the emotion sit with me and flow through me. Right? We don’t resist the emotion. We allow it and we can even love it. Right? That whatever emotion you’re having, maybe it’s anxiety, maybe it’s fear, maybe it’s resistance right. To what you’re going through because ultimately right, it’s just an emotion, right? It’s not gonna kill you. It’s just an emotion. And actually letting it flow through and process, it is actually gonna move it outta your body. So it’s not just sitting in you. So it’s actually, I think a really healthy way, right. To deal with emotions is always just to feel them in the moment, send them love, allow them right. Allow them be curious around them like a scientist, almost like, wow, I feel this in my body. Right? I feel my heart’s beating faster.

Speaker 1: (10:58)
My stomach kind of hurts. Right. Be with that emotion and allow the discomfort, choose to allow the discomfort because you see the long term reward is worth it. Okay. But again, I think having a visual is really, really important. A few other tips I have for people, um, is when dealing with, uh, procrastination is if you have a big goal, like let’s say you want to make $10,000 a month off your online business. And you don’t really know where to start. That can lead people to procrastination. Cuz the feeling they have there typically is overwhelmed. They, they don’t know what to do. So here is the one time I suggest people make list. It’s all about the small steps and just doing the small, small steps and having a small step list. So if that is what you’re feeling overwhelmed, it’s important to write out all the little steps you need to do.

Speaker 1: (11:53)
And then to remind yourself that you have done hard things in the past and sometimes even make a list of all the hard things you’ve done in the past and leave that sitting out at your work desk, you are capable of doing amazing things. And it’s good just to remind your brain that you can do this. Another little trick with procrast is having a bigger, better offer to alleviate the discomfort than, um, what your brain is offering to you with procrastination. So for someone who maybe, um, doesn’t like doing their taxes, right? I always say like maybe the bigger better offer is after you or taxes, you get to have, um, go out for like a, a nice lunch or something. It’s a reward system, right? Our brain is a reward system machine. And so the reason you procrastinate is cuz your brain thinks it will feel better if you procrastinate, right?

Speaker 1: (12:48)
The emotions feel better. But then ultimately you feel worse because then you’re judging yourself or procrastinating, right? So it’s like this icky cycle. Um, so instead provide rewards for yourself. Um, as you move through your goal that are more enticing to your brain than the procrastination reward that’s coming up with in that moment. And again, I like to have a picture of this. I think the, the pictures and the brain resonates much more than words. So if it is going out to lunch or going to the spa, have a picture of someone at the spa sitting on your desk, like a, just print it out. I know some of this stuff might seem a little hokey, but it works. You know, we’re just, you know, we’re trying to tap into various iterations and evolutions of the brain to get them all in alignment for your highest good.

Speaker 1: (13:37)
So parts of your brain really respond to visuals in a way that help you start to envision yourself in the future, doing something. It could really see yourself there. And that’s why visuals are so important. It connects your present day short term reward brain with the idea that there’s a future self already out enjoying this stuff and that you are that future self, you can really identify with them. And that’s how you start to bring that change into the present moment. And one of my favorite favorite tools to share with people I save the, the best for last has to do with hot and old thinking. So if you have that, let’s say your, your resolution is to lose that 15 pounds. Okay. And let’s say you have a cookie in front of you and your brain’s like just one cookie. It’s no problem. You had a bad day, just eat the cookie.

Speaker 1: (14:32)
The thing about procrastination is your brain can come up with a million reasons to do so. Something brains are very smart and it really, really does have your best interest in mind for this exact moment, but not always for your long-term goals. Right? And the cool thing about humans is that we can make future long-term goals. And so we have to find a way for these two parts of our brain to exist. So this is about cold thinking and hot thinking. When you think about the cookie on a hot, what I call hot sense. Okay. A hot sense. You’re thinking about the way the cookie tastes, the way the cookie smells, how you’re are gonna feel when you eat the cookie, right? When you are in hot thinking, you’re gonna really want to eat that cookie. Right? So what I want you to do when you notice you’re in hot thinking around something right, that you’re trying not to do anymore, as part of a resolution, you’re trying to change a behavior.

Speaker 1: (15:26)
You’re trying to change a habit. You’re gonna go to cool thinking. And cool thinking has to do with just describing in a scientific way. The way that thing looks or is. So for the cookie, it might be, it’s a slightly circle, circular, alike shape. The color is light tan, brownish. It’s got black dots on it. It’s sitting on a white, um, plate, glass plate. Okay. I want you to notice how different that hot and cold thinking feels in your body, right? We’re turning on actually two different parts of the brain. And by tapping into the cold thinking, you’re giving yourself an opportunity to then connect more with your future self and make a choice out of your executive functioning brain. Instead of just being on like emotional autopilot, just to eat the cookie because there’s like a lot of reasons your brain will come up with to eat that cookie.

Speaker 1: (16:23)
Trust me. Um, , I’ve heard a ton of ’em and there’s nothing wrong with eating a cookie either. I’m not saying there there is, or is anything wrong with it, but if your goal is cookies anymore for the next six months, then that’s who I’m talking to. And this hot and cold thinking works for businesses as well. Let’s take the example of showing up on Instagram live more often. Okay. The hot thinking here is gonna be, it’s gonna be so embarrassing, right? I, I don’t want this to happen. Like this is gonna feel horrible. Like people are gonna judge me. I’m gonna fail. No one’s gonna listen. People are gonna come on and off like all these thoughts, right? The hot thinking is very emotional. It’s very passionate. It’s very charged. Okay. Versus the cool thinking. When you think about getting on IG live, right?

Speaker 1: (17:13)
All it is, it’s just you on a screen, right? I don’t know all the technology pieces, but you’re being broadcast across on a bunch of other screens to other people and they’re just gonna come on and off. And it doesn’t mean anything about you. Uh, it doesn’t mean anything about your worth. It’s just you, you are showing up on a screen saying words. Other people are showing up to listen or not. Listen. That’s the cool reward when the cool thinking, the cool reward thinking. And when you’re thinking from that place, the cool place, you’re more calm, you’re more collected. And you start to see that this is just one of the small steps you need to take in order to get the big goal and you’re gonna do it. And the cool thing is like the more that not to use that word again. But the wonderful thing is is that once you do it once, twice, three times and you keep doing it again, it’s, what’s called exposure therapy.

Speaker 1: (18:08)
So, or that you do something the better it’s going to feel. And especially something that you have some anxiety towards or that you’re procrastinating for, right? Because you’re, as you start to do it more often, you’re gonna have less of a negative emotional charge to it. Especially if you’re thinking about it in the cool thinking sort of way, right. Without the emotions. And so there won’t be the resistance. There also won’t be the judgment for not doing it on your part. And so all of a sudden that’s how a new habit is formed. Okay. New habits are formed through, excuse me, through managing your emotions, through learning, how to manage, uh, emotions in your body. I mean, yes, making lists are great, but it really has everything to do with learning how to manage your emotions and learn about yourself. So I hope you enjoyed this episode.

Speaker 1: (18:55)
I’m super excited to be sharing it with you. I do have a special offering this next month in January, dealing with helping people with their 20, 22 resolutions helping plant those seeds and of helping them with strategies for their specific procrastination issues. Because I know I just shared a lot of great tools with you, but they aren’t specific just to your issues and the specifics do matter. And so if you need someone to help you work through some of your specific stuff and how to take these tools and really make them work for you so you can grow those things in your life. If you can build the future self, you see, come book. One of these sessions with me, they’re gonna be on my website and my IG account. And they’re just offered for a little bit of time in January to help people specifically with new year’s resolutions and procrastination. Thanks so much for joining. I will talk to you next week.

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